Overwhelmed

Posted on February 22, 2015 by adrienneorris

The hospital continuing to be built.

A popular new song out there currently is titled “Overwhelmed”. I have been reminded of it often as the word overwhelmed comes to my mind. As the school year gets started and there are changes abounding, I feel overwhelmed. Overwhelmed by the amount of work to do. Overwhelmed by the difficulty of raising the level of education. Overwhelmed with how to communicate in a foreign language.

And as I think about being overwhelmed, my perspective changes as I think of the lyrics to this song….

“Overwhelmed”

I see the work of Your Hands
Galaxies spin in a Heavenly dance oh God
All that You are is so overwhelming

I hear the sound of Your Voice
All at once it’s a gentle and thundering noise oh God
All that You are is so overwhelming

Overwhelmed. Overwhelmed by the fact that he continues to do something a new here. Last week I sat and listened to Luis and John give tell their stories again of how they ended up here. And both stories were being written at the exact same time. And both stories had the same line – ” I didn’t want to. I didn’t have the time. ” And yet they both listened to God pulling them ever so close and telling them that this wasn’t just another lead to another place…. that it was where they were supposed to be. And I reflected back on those days where I struggled as well to understand all that God was asking me to give up. And sitting together now, encouraging one another and working with one another through it all brings about a unity that God overwhelms us for a season to bring about His glory.

And through it all, I can hear His voice. His voice saying He is doing something new hear. His voice as He continues to supply. His voice reminding us that these are His people. His voice as he brings together it all.

I must admit that most days I am overwhelmed by the demands of the day. I am overwhelmed by students who need my time and energy. I am overwhelmed, sleep deprived and overstimulated. I am overwhelmed by planning and taking in the students needs and trying to figure out what is needed next. I am overwhelmed by the pouring out of myself…. and yet as I listen to they lyrics I am reminded that is right where He wants us to be… overwhelmed so that we turn to Him and rely on Him for our strength.

God, I run into Your arms
Unashamed because of mercy
I’m overwhelmed, I’m overwhelmed by You

All that You’ve done is so overwhelming
I delight myself in You
In the Glory of Your Presence
I’m overwhelmed, I’m overwhelmed by You

You are Glorious, You are Glorious
Oh God, there is no one more Glorious
You are Glorious, God you are the most Glorious

And so… we may be overwhelmed, but it is because He has the capacity to overwhelm us. We may feel as if we cannot continue on at this pace, but we are given the promise that He will provide. He has in the past… why would we question the future?

Worth It

Posted on February 15, 2015 by adrienneorris

It may not be easy, but it will be worth it.

I struggle to translate some of my favorite quotes into Spanish, but I have found this one to not only translate…. But to mean something. No sera facil…pero valdra la pena.”

This last week was one of those three steps back weeks. We moved forward with the university, which brought encouragement and energy… but it also means that more work is to be done. I felt like I was always behind all week as new things came up daily.

As I watched the adults come in and we began classes, I saw something different in their eyes that I haven’t seen in the younger students. Many of these adults have already finished other post-secondary programs – receiving degrees as teachers, secretaries or even classes in engineering programs. But as I explained to them the importance of their times tables and knowing their addition and subtraction facts, they said no one ever required them to learn them. And this is true. And as we taught fractions –simple fractions – I saw lightbulb after lightbulb go off. Once again, they were not taught. We could easily criticize their education system. I often have. But these adults are just as hungry, if not more, for any education they can get. And so I return to one of my most often quoted phrases… it may not be easy, but it will be worth it.

Easy can be interpreted by everyone differently. Some people find Calculus to be easy. Others struggle to understand how to divide 64 by 6.Yet easy is not what we are aiming for. Easy does not get us any closer to the goal. Our hope is that both students are able to walk away with a sense of accomplishment, to have another skill under their belts and to be able to see, in some small way, how God is drawing them in. I never promise that it will be easy…. Because the easy way many times is not God’s way. What I do promise students is that when they look back, they will know that it was worth it. It was worth it to understand and not just memorize. It was worth it to do it yourself and not just copy someone else’s. It was worth it to do something different. Because we never know how good we can be unless we try.

As eyes glitter and smiles filled faces, I assigned their first homework. Eighteen simple fractions. And here is what I received back. I had forgotten that one of the greatest trademarks of this culture is the pride that they take in even a small assignment that could have been completed on a half sheet of paper. In folders, with title pages, and decorations and drawings. I would like to think they were just excited and enjoyed math that much….

And so… thus begins a new chapter for yet another new group of students.

Christmas Perspective

Posted on December 21, 2014 by adrienneorris

Have you ever thought of what Joseph might have been thinking? Or Mary? What were their emotions? What do you think were their emotions? Do you think that they understood what was happening? Do you think peace ruled in their lives?

Today I contemplated the Shepherds and the Wisemen. And my mind thought a little longer on the Wisemen. I listened to this rendition of their journey ( https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2xJVwVUXkoo ) and it reminded me of my own journey over the last year. They were told to follow the star and they did. It wasn’t a day trip or even a month trip. I imagine they were on the road for quite some time. They weren’t actually at the birth of Jesus because of the length of their journey, but they found him after his birth in the home of Mary and Joseph. I imagine many along the way asked where they were headed. I imagine many along the way wondered why their journey was important. They didn’t know the length of their journey or their destination. Did they tell everyone that they were searching for the King? Did they always agree amongst themselves? When they arrived at Jesus’s home, was it what they expected? Here they were of noble status – yet they found themselves at the home of every day individuals, kneeling on a dirt floor, welcoming their King. The true picture of what that day looked like was sure different from what is depicted at times.

I am not Wise. I am not a man. But I am on the same journey as the Wisemen. Jesus has already come into this world. He has made His presence known. His hand still guides the steps of His followers. Like the Wisemen, I have heard the voice telling me to go. My eyes are fixed on that same star – the one that leads to the home of my Savior, my King. And right now He has placed that star over Guatemala. The journey is not always comfortable. But the destination is worth it!

As you contemplate this Christmas season, put yourself in the shoes of someone else in the story 2000 years ago. Mary in that stable holding a physical baby who was to become the Savior of the world. Or the Shepherds who God chose to be at the manger scene, just hours before were doing the same thing that they did day in or day out. Just like the shepherds, you have been chosen too to be a part of the story that God continues to write until the coming back to this earth of the Savior King. And so this season, let’s celebrate with joy and expectation.

Merry Christmas!

” Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God.” Hebrews 12:2

Watching Each Step

Posted on December 6, 2014 by adrienneorris

Since school is out, I have had the opportunity to go to clinic in Chiminisijuan. This clinic is nestled high in the mountains offering amazing views…. And I love to go there because the people truly have a need….. Today’s trip was not as enjoyable as some others that I have had….

This last time there provided more of a challenge though as it had rained there and I don’t think the clouds had lifted for a few days. It was damp. It was cold. The road was slippery, so we had to park halfway and walk. I usually embrace this opportunity. It would have been better if I had thought ahead… I was without proper shoes to walk or a rain jacket. Some might have labeled me a rookie.

As I made my way down the road, I had to be careful of every step. It’s sort of like when I run, and I have to watch for the roots, cowpies, rocks, holes or anything else that might trip me up. On the road I was in search of the red dirt and the sand as these spots were more solid. If my foot found the lighter dirt, there was a good chance it would just slip – and potentially could face plant in the mud. On my very first trip here ten years ago, I feel a good ten feet down one hill and was sure I could repeat this adventure again. As I found solid footing, I trusted the rocks most and wished that the entire road was lined with rocks.

The walk gave me time to think and reflect on the conversations I had this week last with others– and drew a parallel with the trek to the clinic and our trek in life. School and classes are officially over and I am preparing for a break from teaching. I have seen some of last year’s students and listened to their current thoughts…. how they parallel so many other adolescents in the world today….

We all know that we try to avoid the trials in life. We try to avoid slipping or falling. We want to keep our feet on solid ground. We look for the rocks, we look towards friends, we look towards stability. We don’t want to end up cold or wet or miserable. And yet one wrong step might find us on unstable ground, headed in a direction that we don’t intend. How quickly it can happen – and we didn’t even see it coming. That’s why it’s always better to look where you’re going. To find the path that has the best chance at providing stability. Yet, sometimes we do slip. Sometimes we do find ourselves in mud that we do not want. Sometimes we have to backtrack a little bit. This happened to be along the road. I would be on one side, thinking it had the best footing for avoiding the mud, and my foot would just sink. I could continue on, or withdraw it and start again. In life we get stuck too. In life we slip into the valley. Sometimes knowingly and sometime unknowingly. It just happens. But if we stay there too long; if we keep going in the wrong direction without heeding the warning…. The option of turning back might not be available any longer. And so I tried to keep my eyes fixed forward, on the footsteps of others to see where the path was solid and where I wanted to take a turn.

And so my encouragement to you is this… to keep your eyes focused ahead, looking for the ROCK –which is Christ. The one who lays out our steps for us. The One whose desire is to get us to our destination on solid ground. And when you slip, because we all do, pick up your foot and put it back on solid ground. Retreat if you need to back to the solid ground.

Before I left clinic my day was more than brightened. This little girl was one of our last. She came up behind me without me seeing her and wrapped her arms around my legs. When I turned around, I was greeted with the biggest smile and laughter. God not only provides rocks to help us along our path. But he provides smiles as well to warm us.

“ For who is God, but the Lord? And who is a Rock, except our God? This God is my strong refuge and has made my way blameless. He made my feel like the feet of a deer and set me secure on the heights.” II Samuel 22:32-34

Cling to the Call

Posted on December 5, 2014 by adrienneorris

I have had two confirmations in the past week….. reminders of why we are here doing what we are doing. John Waller wrote a song called “Cling to the Call” that is on my morning playlist that is set to shuffle. It played this morning and was the reminder I needed as I have had a heavy heart this week…..

… cling to the call Cling to the peace that guards your heart

Cling to the promise though you stumble you won’t fall

I will uphold you now just trust me with all

Just look at me and I will lead you as you cling to the call…

What is a calling? What is the call that John talks about here? For each person I feel it is unique. For me it has become being obedient to the things that God asks of me in different seasons of life. But as I reflect to all the places God has taken me and grown me – junior high, high school, college, Guatemala, Virginia, Pennsylvania, Guatemala – the call on my life has remained the same. To love Jesus and love those He puts in my life. All of these circumstances have changed me, challenged me, grown me into who I am today. Yet I believe each of these experiences were important for me to be who I am today.

When I came to Guatemala, I was actually expecting something to change. I was expecting to not be drawn to the adolescent crowd. I was expecting to have to change who I was. I had mentally brainstormed ways that would be more culturally appropriate to teach and relate. The way I approach my students, the way I teach is not common. It is very direct, very awkward at times…. And is about as far away from typical Guatemalan culture as you could get. I actually feel out of my comfort zone teaching counter culturally as opposed to within my comfort zone in the states. But as my time here stretched from weeks, to months to a year…. God responded clearly that He had prepared me for this time for this reason for this position – to be bold, direct and speak truth. And He confirmed this to me over the last year as He kept on telling me He wanted something different for these students.

As I tried to grasp the language and a vocabulary to not only understand but be able to respond back, I found that it was during these times (a direct conversation with a student or another teacher) that the words flowed smoother from my tongue than any other time. Times that I will credit only as “God Moments” as I am pretty sure I could not remember those vocabulary words again in a normal conversation. And those were the times that gave me the most encouragement… as He confirmed to me that our calling can be cross-cultural and that He was asking me to do something different for a reason.

There are cultural differences, teaching differences, barriers, boundaries, different ways of doing things and challenges every day that many times took my heart away from the calling that I cannot deny on my life. At times I feel as if I drifted away and was distracted as demands of paperwork and different priorities pulled me away from having the time to do what God had asked me to do at times….. but He continued to press it upon my heart and keep me steadfast focused on what was before me. He continued to call me out and remind me how important people were to Him, how important relationships were. And if we cling to Him, cling to what He has called us to- He upholds us. He leads us. He strengthens us. His love becomes our love. And we love because He first loved us.

As we approach this Christmas season, my pastor has been doing a series entitled “Every Person has a Story.” This is the story of how you came to Christ….. and on how you have encountered Christ in your life. This is the story about what Christ has called you to live out in your life. For me this has been on ongoing story – where I could write chapter after chapter. And I know that He is not done using me. To me it is interesting that these two challenges have closed out my school year here. I know it is just another time where God is reminding me to keep my eyes focused on Him.

We each have a story though. And everyone’s story is different. Don’t be afraid to share your story. And cling to the calling that you have in your own life as well to live out what God has asked you to do…. even when it might seem counter cultural or uncomfortable at times.

Thanks for following along on this journey – may you be blessed during this Christmas season.

A Guatemalan Thanksgiving

Posted on November 27, 2014 by adrienneorris

Do they celebrate Thanksgiving in Guatemala?

I have heard this often over the last two weeks and the answer is… The Pilgrims did not come to Guatemala, so the country does not recognize the day…. but WE will be recognizing the day, with as many American traditions as possible.

We are without the constant reminders every time you go to the store and the television and radio advertisements… and so the day feels much like any other day here. But in some ways, it helps us to focus on the bounty of THANKS that we have over the last year for all that God has done and provided here.

This past year has not been an easy one – as we have been stretched and asked to do more than we have felt possible at times. But as I reflect back on where we were a year ago and where we are now, I can see clearly so many things that I am truly thankful for.

… for all of the people God has brought together to advance His kingdom, whether they are here or there…. He has provided people to fill in gaps where they were much needed, equipping each with their own gifts.

… for financial provisions that have provided for the hospital ground, opening of the school, construction equipment and materials, and labor.

… for personal health that has kept me from major illness during this time here – and for healing through those weeks where the virus kept attacking.

… for a first class of students that were gifted with a lot of grace and patience to accept change, adapt and encourage me through the first year of teaching in Spanish.

… for protection and favor for us as we will always be foreigners trying to work within a foreign system.

… for cultural adaptation – to be able to love the people here for who they are, amongst their own culture and to be able to connect in part on a heart level.

… for the opportunity to serve a God that is doing things greater than we could ever imagine.

… for a support system in the states that has encouraged me, listened to me and upheld us in prayer through the challenges of this past year.

2014 has been a milestone year – one that I will be sure to remember when they all start to flow together….with ups and downs, challenges and victories…. but one in which my faith has been solidified as I have lived in the middle of a whirlwind. I have experienced what it is like to live where God is active and alive…. and we have been blessed.

Hoping that you all have experienced His presence this same way in the past year!

Why a Hospital?

Posted on November 12, 2014 by adrienneorris

Why a hospital….

This question is often asked to me. “Aren’t there any hospitals for the people?” In reality, the nearest hospital is two hours away. But the definition of a hospital here and the idea of a hospital are two different things. It is hard to grasp a building that is sparsely equipped with less than 200 beds that serves over a million people. And unfortunately, many of the people from our area are afraid to go to the hospital due to racism and discrimination that has been shown to their families and neighbors in the past. Everyone seems to know some horror story about something that happened in the national hospital.

Why a hospital…

Today I spoke with a 20 year old woman, pregnant with a hydrocephalic baby. She didn’t understand what was wrong with her baby or the complications. She asked if it was a rabbit or a pig that was inside of her. As I watched the affect of her face and saw how motionless she was, I realized…. I wish she didn’t have to go through the government system. She will be left with more questions and more confusion…. if only we could refer her from our hospital….

Or for the 3 week old baby of one of our workers. Believing that the baby had meningitis, they took him to the hospital where he was taken from the parents and placed in the ICU. The next day there was an explosion of gas at the hospital and everyone was evacuated. The parents could not find their son (in the hospital here, the parents are often not told what is wrong and are not allowed to see their children – creating fear and uncertainty with many people). The parents were eventually given their baby and told he had an infection and there was nothing they could do. They sent them home and the baby died that day. The truth is the baby may have still died in our hospital, but we could have started treatment earlier. We could have shown compassion and Christ to the family. We would have allowed them to know what was happening and how they could pray.

Or the sixteen year old girl who came on Saturday who’s baby was 22 weeks develop and died in utero. She cried and cried which is not common here. I wish she could be surrounded by doctors and nurses during this process who would show her love and pray with her.

Or the woman that came in the afternoon Saturday, eight weeks pregnant with an ectopic pregnancy – in such severe pain that she passed out when she stood up. She already had signs of shock and had to ride the three hours to the nearest hospital on incredibly bumpy roads…. my prayer was that when she got there, they would treat her before she died.

For the two year old boy with severe pneumonia. The third child of a mom who is just 22. His stats were in the 70s and the father was working at the coast. The mom had no help at home and chose to give him medicine and pray. For her to navigate the hospital system here is extremely difficult.

These are just the cases I remember from that day, where I thought, “this would be a good day to have a hospital”. And so, we press forward with the task at hand, believing that a hospital in our area will provide for those who have no other options. The road to here has not been easy, but God is leading. God is guiding. And we take one day at a time.

A Trip to the City

Posted on September 24, 2014 by adrienneorris

I had to go to the city to renew my passport, and I was reminded again of the difference in the two areas. As we flew into the city, we passed over towns. In the rural areas there is more adobe. More space between houses. More green. More trees. And as we approached the city, all that you can see is the tin of the roofs and concrete. Oh how these areas are so different. There is such a contrast between the city and the rural area – in every aspect (economically, educationally, security, space, priorities). There is no green space, no fresh air, no place that is quiet or peaceful or safe. The stores all have bars over them. There are guards with guns protecting every store. The people that are out are always aware of their surroundings and rushing from one place to the next. And they appear to be afraid. Everywhere you go it is dirty, it is covered with concrete and rusted tin and it smells of diesel.

As we drove the streets I was so thankful that I did not have to live in this environment daily. We drove past shoeshine boys and I wondered if they were runaways or orphans that took to the streets in hopes of a better life. When cars stopped at intersections, there were different entertainers that walked past the cars in hopes of a handout, playing music or performing. I saw one mom who had a baby strapped to her back. She would bend at the waste to make a table and her about 7 year old daughter would stand on her back and juggle. There were homeless men and women wandering the streets with crutches, without shoes, collecting anything they could find that they thought useful. And my heart screamed. Where ever you go, in any big city you will see this. It is not just found here in Guatemala.

I am sure that there are families poorer that what I saw yesterday living in the rural area. There are families that come to us in need of food or resources. But the lifestyle is so different. I am thankful for the safety and security that surrounds us. I am thankful for the greenness and freshness that invades the rural highlands. I am thankful to inhale dust instead of diesel smells. I am thankful to be able to sleep at night to the sound of crickets and rain instead of trucks and horns and music. I am thankful to be called to work here and not in the city….

The mountains of the highland.

The valley in which I live.

The town of Canilla

The mountains during the dry season.

Trusting

Posted on August 22, 2014 by adrienneorris

This verse has been a keystone in my life ever since college. I can remember reading it one night and the words popping into my head differently that they ever had before. It wasn’t about me and what I thought should be right or what my own understanding was. It wasn’t how I saw the situation or even how I understood it to be. My own understanding was so small in comparison to the understanding that God had for all of the circumstances surrounding me. And so the focus flipped from me trying to understand circumstances to me trusting. And in a way… that’s how I ended up here.

Someone reminded me this last week that my year mark was coming up. Infact, it is now past. They talked about how going from the first to the second year is the hardest… and I thought…. this first year couldn’t have been any harder. In a way, maybe it’s like this last year was a second year to me. Over the last year I’ve watched several friends head off to foreign lands and new experiences as well, but I feel like the experiences they had during that first year were different from what I had. There was little newness and yet all was new over this last year. There were adjustments – sometimes monthly, sometimes weekly. There were situations that were rewarding and situations that I thought could not get any harder.

Not having consistency. Not knowing about the future. These can cause immediate stress because we as humans are wired to want to have schedules and plan and know what is to come. And so really, as I reflect on this last year. As I reflect why is was that I came here in the first place. As I ask myself what this last year has been all about… it can be summed up by saying I only knew I had to be obedient to what had been laid on my heart. I knew that I was needed. I knew that I was a piece of the puzzle that God was putting together here. And I knew I had a choice. To remain where I was comfortable within the security of the boundaries of my life…. or to not lean on my own understanding. To step out into the unknown and cling to a reliance on trust with all of my heart. One day… the path will be straight!

Fear often grips us from making any decision. And fear I definitely had last summer not knowing what to expect. But fear is just a distraction that keeps us from living at our potential. A friend is here with us this week who has made a decision in her life that requires a lot of faith in Christ as well….. and as we talked over the decision she made and moving forward…. we were reminded that staying where we are because we don’t know what it will look like on the other side is not really an option. Sometimes we are only asked to take the next step… and in the next step God will reveal to us what the step after that looks like. This has been life for me and I have been in constant change over the last year. But what I seek each day is simple… to be available and used by God how He intends.

Desperation

Posted on August 13, 2014 by adrienneorris

Desperation. This is the attitude that has begun to cover this valley. Can you picture downcast faces? Can you picture deep brown eyes that appear empty? Can you see the child clinging to the skirt of his mother as they walk through market? This time of year is generally the hardest. Their harvest of corn from the previous year has dwindled and they are still waiting for this year’s crop to be ready. Except that there may not be a crop this year. We have been without rain in what is to be the rainy season. The corn is looking pathetic and dead. Even if it were to rain now, it would not save the corn. They have spent much money on this year’s seed. They have spent more money on fertilizer to make it grow. This money was spent with the hope of a new crop. And yet, this crop has not born fruit. When I walked through market this last week, there was a heaviness that hung upon everyone. The prices for everything have begun to rise. Corn prices are double what they usually are. And in this culture, corn is life. It is what they use to make tortillas, and without tortillas, many of them do not know how they will survive.

When we entered into San Andres on Sunday for clinic, there was a procession and idol in front of us going through the streets with many people gathered around. We could hear the bombs being set off. Yet it wasn’t a holiday. Our translators told us that it was for the “Rain god” … the bombs were to wake him and make it rain. It was a very spiritually dark place. Desperation was evident and abounding.

And so we have begun to talk about what can be done. We are preparing to see more malnutrition, more hunger and more illness. We are preparing to hear more stories of hungry families and to see more tears. This drought is different from the drought five years ago. We have been told that it has reached much of Central America and isn’t isolated in one area like in the past. That means that corn will not be coming into the country through neighboring countries as well. And so we will wait and see what kind of harvest we have and what can be done from there. We are sure that it is not a rain god that needs awoken to cause rain, but that the God of our Universe is the one who cares immensely more for these people than anyone else. And so it is with hope that we look over this valley and pray for these people…. That their desperation would turn them towards God…. That they may experience His provision and love over the next months as they walk this path.

Romans 8:24-25 For in this hope we were saved. Now hope that is seen is not hope. For who hopes for what he sees? But if we hope for what we do not see, we wait for it with patience.